Slacking Off a Week Before a Marathon

Thursday's run was uneventful. 4 miles. Easy.

Today's run was supposed to be a 3-miler. However, due to a day-long wedding of a friend, I missed my opportunity to run. I did, however, make up for it by drinking beer and overeating, which is, more or less, the same as running 3 miles. Not long ago, 3 miles would have seemed somewhat daunting. Now, I could go skip and jump 3 miles without breaking a sweat (that's not to say I wouldn't break anything - an ankle or a leg could easily be snapped by bounding about recklessly).

The marathon is about 173 hours away. I really need to plan out my in-flight meals for the occasion. If there's one area in which I've really fallen behind so far, it's energy and water intake while running. I learned, in my last long run before the race, that neglecting these needs can be a real deal breaker. My plan, as of now, is to bring along 4 or 5 gu products to eat/slurp/drink during the second half of the run. There will be water and sports drink stations along the course, but I don't think there will be gu kiosks.

This should be a map I charted (using mapmyrun.com) of the almost official race course:

4.44 Miles and a Touch of Fall

The rains came yesterday at about the time that another autumn heat wave was supposed to arrive and elevate the air temperature to the mid 80's. Fortunately, the rain won the race and kept the temperature down in the mid-to-low 70's. So, I took advantage of the pleasant (although still too warm) temperature and ran 4.44 miles this afternoon. I followed a route that starts on the street outside of my building and heads straight for the river. The following Louisville Landmarks can be enjoyed while running this quick route:

• University of Louisville Hospital and The J.G. Brown Cancer Center - eyesores architecturally, but valuable institutionally


• Louisville Slugger Field - home of The Fighting, Flying, Louisville River Bats of AAA Baseball. Farm team of the always bad Cincinnati Reds. Nice park that harkens back to the days when masons built ballparks. The team was actually really good this year. Probably could have given their AAAA bretheren a run for their money


• Riverfront Park and The Great Lawn - Louisville's attempt to reclaim the downtown waterfront from the utter lack of good judgment exhibited by city planners who decided to adorn the river with an ugly interstate (I64). The attempt was actually quite successful. People use the park. Just this afternoon, I saw a couple of groups of kids playing ultimate frisbee and a gentleman manning upwards of 12 fishing poles.


• The Belle of Louisville and Spirit of Jefferson Steamboats - The Belle has been a city-owned treasure for years now. Originally christened The Idlewild, she used to offer ferry service between Memphis, TN and West Memphis, AR, presumably to provide passage for satanic, ritual murderers escaping the holy backwaters of West Memphis. She came to Louisville in 1931 and offered service between downtown and Fontaine Ferry Park, an old amusement park in Portland. Now, in her golden years, The Belle hosts dinner cruises and daily calliope concerts. The Spirit of Jefferson also hosts lunch and dinner cruises and was put in place to address Louisville's unquenchable thirst for steamboat revelry.


• Those crazy, giant inflatable white moneys - unfortunately, the aforementioned monkeys have disappeared. They had been stationed just south of Sixth St. and River Road. No one knows why they were there. One popular theory suggest that they are migratory, inflatable monkeys who travel along the Ohio who, upon finding the Falls of The Ohio impassable, decided to dock in downtown Louisville. Another rumor is that they were tragically deflated. In any case, everyone agrees that they are missed and are welcome back at anytime.

4.8 Miles

Tonight's run was supposed to cover 4 miles. Instead, I pushed it to nearly 5 to prove a point:

While running after dark, I typically follow the loop at Seneca Park. The loop contains a paved recreation track that spans about 12 feet in width and covers 1.2 miles. Without fail, there are always several people engaged in recreation who insist on occupying the side of the track on their left in spite of the fact that everyone learns at an early age that one travels to one's right and passes on one's left. These must be the same people who, as drivers, travel in the left-handed lane bereft of intention to pass. There is no gentle way to state this: these people are either mentally defective, inconsiderate or both.

In any case, tonight, there was a quasi speed walker occupying the wrong side of the track. Unfortunately, she was traveling in the same direction I was, so I would have to stop and turn around in order to inform her that she's an idiot. Although I was disinclined to slow down, I realized that, if I switched directions, I could confront the demon head-on. So, after completing my 3rd circuit, I turned around to run my 4th in the opposite direction.

A satisfying game of chicken was almost certain. My pace quickened, as did my pulse. My rough calculations placed the point of confrontation just after the 2nd turn. As I accelerated through the 2nd turn, I saw a figure in the distance (keep in mind that, while the track is illuminated, the lights are spaced far apart). I trained my eyes on the figure, hugged the inside of the track (my right side) and sprinted towards the figure. As the figure drew closer, I noticed that it was a child. A lone child, jogging madly down the track on his right-hand side. A child no older than 12 or 13, jogging alone at night and observing convention by traveling on his right. I was moved to offer a high-five, but realized that it was dark and he was young (where were his parents?) and, given that he was well-trained enough to run on the proper side of the track, I wasn't prepared to test his preparedness with a can of mace. In any case, the game of chicken never materialized. The offending woman finished her power walk before our showdown. I did manage to shoot a disapproving glance in her direction as she sped off (likely in the wrong lane).

I believe I've mentioned this before, but I will reiterate it again here: while running, nothing motivates me more than a healthy dose of injustice or ignorance of commonly accepted rules and conventions. As much as I dislike the offending woman, I must thank her for inspiring me to finish my run strongly. Still, I do hope she gets her comeuppance, or is at least made to see the error of her wicked ways.

More Baseball

2 outs in the bottom 8th in game 4 of ALDS...

The Sox are not going to win this series for one reason: Scot Shields.

Oh, and Francona made a potentially series-changing blunder by leaving Masterson in to face Torii Hunter. He absolutely should have had Papelbon up and ready. I know they've been leaning on him, but if they don't, they have to go back to LA of Anaheim for a game 5. Taking 3 of 3 in a week from LA in Anaheim is not likely. At the very least, he should have had Delcarmen come in after that wild pitch snafu.

In any case, the tide has turned. I'm expecting a game 5 blowout in favor of LA of Anaheim (of Los Angeles).

This game isn't over yet, but I'm not expecting much. The Sox aren't hitting very well at Fenway. Tito won't take out Masterson...


Update: top of the 8th

The Sox just caught a very lucky break: after a leadoff double (off, of all people, Masterson) and a sac bunt, Varitek caught Reggie Willits (who, for the record, is a white guy) going on a mis-executed suicide squeeze. Shortly, thereafter, a groundout got The Sox out of trouble. Onto the bottom of the 9th...


Update: bottom of the 9th
Shields is going to burn through this lineup. They can't touch him. There's not a single killer in this lineup right now. Who wouldn't trade their first-born for Manny right now?

Oh Snap! Jason Bay. That's who you trade for Manny...And then you get Jed Lowrie to single him home.

I should know better - the new Red Sox don't choke.

No run today, but yesterday's 12-miler was just fine. I waited until the early evening in hopes that the temperature would drop. By the half-way point, it had cooled down to the mid 70's, which provided for a pleasant jaunt.

On Baseball

For the second straight year, the National League Divisional Series have been a total snore. Both series were decided within an inning.

The Cubs were hugely disappointing. When faced with the unexplainable, people tend to invent superstition (see: the entire history of mythology). The curse of the goat, while silly, makes as much sense as magic men, immaculate conceptions, magic eyewear and alien homunculi. Many folks on Chicago's north side will be looking to the goat to explain the Cubs collapse. Personally, I'm with them. There is no rational explanation for their collapse. Yes, one can cite incompetent defense, a return to form for Dempster and a general inability to hit. One can also bring up the fact that folks like Derek Lowe and Manny Ramirez just don't lose in the post season. Still, The Cubs were playing well as recently as a week ago. I know it's just one series, but why now? Why the most important series of the season? One is inclined to think that there are unseen forces at work. And those forces are likely put into action by a goat.

The Brewers never had much of a chance. As we saw in last year's ALCS, C.C. Sabathia doesn't seem to perform well under pressure. And The Brewers hopes hinge on Sabathia. In fact, the Brewers just pinch hit Sabathia (in place of the always terrible Jeff Suppan - remember his brilliant base-running in the '04 World Series?). You don't pinch hit a pitcher in the post season. Rather, if you are forced to, you likely don't have the depth to advance. I know this series isn't officially over, but The Brewers are totally overmatched. The Phillies are better at just about every position.

The ALDS:

Anyone who actually hopped on the Angels bandwagon was foolish. The Red Sox absolutely own the Angels in postseason play. To best understand the complexion of this series, watch Howie Kendrick the next time he comes to the plate (is Scioscia is brave/dumb enough to play Kendrick again). He's absolutely killing his team. He swung at everything Daisuke and Lester threw at him. Most dramatic we're the breaking balls he was striking out on against Matsuzaka. Most of them would have been passed balls had a lesser catcher been behind the plate. Howie needs to take a game off.

Oh, and how about J.D. Drew? That home run against K-Rod was awesome. I love to see "bad ass" closers get destroyed. That was definitely the final straw. The Angels are not coming back from that. Not with Beckett at Fenway standing in their way.

The Rays/Red Sox ALCS will be the de facto World Series (just like last year). As great as Manny and Lowe are in the post season, I don't think those two can beat the AL pennant winner alone. In any case, I'm looking forward to the ALCS. I really like both teams. I'll give the edge to The Red Sox because of the post season experience thing. Hopefully, the series will be as exciting as last year's ALCS.

More Autumn Heat

The heat is back in the Ohio River valley. For some reason, summer will not go away. Leaves are falling off of trees, but instead of exhibiting a wide range of autumnal colors, they're just going straight to brown and dying. Fall is my favorite season. In my youth, Louisville used to experience fall. Then, I moved away to Boston for awhile, came back and found autumn had moved away.

On a related note, while watching the vice presidential debate the other night, Sarah Palin's comments about global warming really resonated with me (and I'm sure with many other know-nothing, mentally defective wingnuts). To sum it up: no, there is no such phenomenon as global warming. Maybe there has been a slight increase in global temperature, but it's just part of the temperature cycle that jesus and randy christ laid out 2000 years ago (incidentally, our new earth's 2000th bithday!). However, none of this shit: polar ice cap melting, violent weather events, polar bears migrating into arctic population centers and demanding welfare - which the minority loving dems are all too happy to hand out - is a result of human behavior. In short, this isn't our fault. It's god's plan and we don't really understand or know the cause, but that's not going to keep us from fixing it!!?!!

Hey Sarah Palin, I want autumn back! Can you please pray for that? I know it's anathema to f around with the grand plan, but this really sucks. Could you please just talk to him a bit? Think of the children! No more candy apples and jack-o-lanterns! No more pumpkin pies! First, they went and deprived the children of their baby dinosaur playmates (not sure how, whatever climate even took out the dinosaurs must not have affected people. I guess person technology was more advanced back then). Now, he wants to take away the babies' apple cider! We can't let this happen. Pray for us! While you're at it, could you axe for the dinosaurs back? My nephew doesn't get along too well with people. He's allergic to dogs and cats. He needs a companion. His allergist has signed off on a pet pterodactyl, but we can't seem to find one. Help us, Sarah Palin; you're our only hope!

Fortunately, the heat just came today, so yesterday was still pretty pleasant (low 70's). So, yesterday's 10-miler was nice. Today's 12-miler won't be quite so great. Temperature has reached 80 and it's only 1:30pm.

GingerRollerQueen and Others

The GingerRollerQueen is an unstoppable force. Like a bionic combination between a Madame Tussaudsesque Carrot Top and a snow machine, she glides up hills on her inline skates, decimating all things in her way. She skates on the wrong side of the street. She doesn't care what you think, she's going to skate her heart out, because you don't change the world by not skating.

When one runs in Cherokee Park, one will often encounter The GRQ. She flies furiously up hills like her cousin, snowsuit-wearer-even-in-July Guy, who is some sort of uphill skating savant. Both of these characters are driven by some sort of mysterious, unseen force that is both awesome and powerful. Unfortunately, every time GRQ skates past, I throw up a little bit. The first time it happened, I didn't think much of it - a standard blame in on the pre-run 1/2 pound of bacon thing. The second time, I was stricken, more by my excitement at having seen GRQ again. The third time, it occurred to me that her appearance is always accompanied by gastrointestinal distress. Hopefully, the next time she appears, the two of us can have our portrait painted.

10.12 miles through the park today. 65 degrees, clear, sunny, low humidity. In other words, a perfectly glorious day for running (of for encountering magical, mythical monsters, like GRQ).

I also ran into a Yorkie with a person's voice. And not just any person's voice, Gilbert Godfried's voice. Terrifying beast. Had I not swerved to avoid it, it most definitely would have destroyed me, or at least made me vomit.

5 miles tomorrow. 5 miles Saturday. 12 miles Sunday. It's all downhill from here, until the marathon. I was a bit nervous after Monday's disaster, but felt great today.